Progerian Massacre

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The Progerian Massacre was a military effort by Ilyria, vetous, the Sylvian Union, Grove Tribe, Yugoslavia, Doctor Hound, and Goomlandia that resulted in the destruction of the first Progerian settlement and repeated spawnkilling and surrender of the Progerian citizens of the time.


On the night of Dec 2 2019, Keetsu, a Progerian sleeper agent, raided, looted and griefed the Ilyrian capital, Grand Mesa, as everyone was offline. All Ilyrian valuables were stolen and livestock killed, and a lava trap was left in front of the NELT, killing MiksaSerbia and destroying the last of his possessions. It is suspected that cimcimmy, the Progerian sleeper agent in Kovska, also participated, as signs saying "Raided by Kovska" were found in the city. This sparked outrage in the international community, with many nations rallying against Progeria and Kovska, and several people went looking for the Progerian base, with FlyingGMM eventually discovering it in the Eastern Ice Sea. The Kovskan leader claimed innocence (it was later deemed that he likely was innocent, as cimcimmy was a mole in his nation) and was eventually left alone, but the retaliators prepared to attack Progeria.


FlyingGMM of Montrose was the first to arrive at the Progerian base, soon followed by vetous of Vailan, CreeperColder and BurningRainbow of the Grove Tribe, tagtag of Montrose and then finally MiksaSerbia of Ilyria himself. A TNT cannon was set up to blow up parts of the melon house the Progerians had built, and some of the Ilyrian possessions were retrieved from the destroyed chests, but most of the valuable items were still missing, and as the attackers failed to find any secret rooms, it was resolved the offline Progerians must have them on their persons. At one point, vetous had to log off, and he would be offline for most of the event's duration.

The Montrosians, Grove Tribers and Miksa then decided to set up a fort just out of view from the Progerian settlement, to await the Progerians logging on. Fort Swerdą was then constructed in a cooperative effort. coolnut10 from HUM arrived soon after that. Following some deliberation, Goomyman77 was invited to help test out the fort in a military drill that resulted in goomy getting killed once and killing everyone except Miksa the second time. After the drill's conclusion, Goomlandia also voted to partake in the war effort. Several more members of the Sylvian war host and Doctor Hound then arrived in preparation of the Progerians logging on soon, which FlyingGMM had intel of.

As soon as danielmihranhano logged on, the attackers descended upon him, killing him dozens of times altogether before he managed to break his bed and flee. An hour or so later, Keetsu also logged on, entering negotiations with Miksa. However, he died in lava and claimed to have lost all of Miksa's stuff, and Miksa said the main thing he wanted was revenge. Agents from Yugoslavia and Sylvia together with Doctor Hound then proceeded to kill the Progerians at spawn for several hours, leading to the event being called a massacre (and even a genocide by the Progerians themselves).


After peace was made, Progeria agreed to make amends and pay reparations to Ilyria. They then moved their dwellings to Vailan, which had notably not given them permission to settle there. As time went on, it became more and more clear that Progeria did not intend to pay the reparations and was ignoring Miksa's calls to do so. Eventually, their new settlement was raided and destroyed by Miksa, goomyman77 and Doctor_Prock, leading to them trying to grief the entire server without distinction and being banned forthwith.